A time travel.

Smile to the world and it will smile back, was something I was told as a child.

So I smiled, smiled and smiled…

When the people around me were well, Aja was well too. Naturally, I became the Queen by making others smile and feel good. From the inside and out.

So, why was this so important to me? To make the world around me happy and smiling?

From being a genuinely smiling, happy and free little Swiss girl in my mind and heart, the seriousness came pretty quickly when we moved to Heimdal a small suburb outside of Trondheim, Norway when I was 4.

Honestly, I do not remember much of that period except for that my dearest Swiss Grosspapi (Grandpa) died suddenly of lung cancer.

No wonder he got sick really, he was a handsome man of his time, finely dressed in taylor-made suits and the cigarette constantly lying there gently in the corner of his mouth while playing his violin...I loved the man.

I also remember that I had to learn a totally new, foreign language, Norwegian, so when my dad on top of that moved out of our house to the house next door and then all the way to Tromsø, it was hard for a daddy girl like me. Divorce is always rocky for a kid on some level.

In addition, I lay 4 months in a cast from the waist down on both legs due to a major hip operation when I was 5. I had to learn to walk again after that. It was simply a physically and mentally tough and painful time. Tears, struggle and a feeling of loneliness.

Outside, I continued to smile, even though my heart did not smile as much anymore.

I was probably a sensitive young person, but appeared strong. "You are such a brave girl", my mother often said. She meant well. But I did not want to be brave. It was just my unconscious, childish survival strategy. I hated it every time it was mentioned.

Isn’t it strange how we shape our lives as innocent children?

Coaching for better self-confidence

Happiness. Where did I find it? I think I have always had my own connection with my senses. With what smells, tastes, with the soft and beautiful. I remember the delicious, cozy smell of Mom's freshly baked bread.

I also remember very well the mysterious room in the attic of the house we lived in. The house that my grandfather had built.

There were boxes upon boxes of fragrant tea leaves. Large boxes you could sit on. The smells that mingled with pine from the small cubicle in the attic. My Grandma had run Trondheim's first tea shop. I could sit there, all alone, in peace and smile to myself. I always felt happy and peaceful in that room. It was my go-to-room when I was sad.

40 years ahead. I sit with a group of people in the Fritzøe Suite at Farris Bad, one of my favorite locations for leadership and team gatherings.

The team wants better customer flow, they want efficient processes, they want better communication and a sense of responsibility among the employees.

In other words; they want to tune in, sell more goods, achieve better results, and at the same time have (super) satisfied customers.

There is a good atmosphere in the group. A little tension in the air at first, but that is completely normal and perfectly ok. The leader is open and curious and the team becomes more and more confident in each other.

After 3 days, the group is full of new insights, trust, much better understanding of both themselves and the group, a little sad that the training days are over, but clear and motivated to put the insights and knowledge into practice. Yes. Well done!

We continue with regular follow-up meetings online for a period, to keep the conversation warm and to ensure the quality of the process.

It pays off. Within a year, they experience significant growth and the team flourishes.

My Goodness, I would rather die than do this… I lie and writhe in physical and mental pain on a floor backstage in a concert hall in The Netherlands. I'm so nervous that I almost throw up and cry. I probably do cry…

I'm in the middle of my Masterdegree at the Conservatory in Amsterdam and it's 5 minutes until I go in and play the whole incredibly physically and mentally demanding violin concerto by Johannes Brahms in D major for a live audience.

I hear the orchestra warm up, then they tune in to the tone of the oboist, while I stand behind and tremble. My boyfriend is in the hall, but it does not help. I would rather be sucked inside the biggest black hole in the Universe. Einstein was right about black holes. Give me one now!

Forward to the present and to my dear office. I'm sitting with a customer of mine, an Executive nicely dressed in a suit and blue shirt. He has politely taken off his shoes. Hanged off his jacket. He is already "house warm" and relaxed.

He says that something happened after the previous conversation. He has not felt so light and happy in 30 years.

The problems we talked about last time in relation to the job, solved naturally and what is most strange, he says, is that it has been so much better at home as well. His 11-year-old son, who is usually withdrawn or angry, has opened up and they have even had fun playing football together and cozying up at home.

The challenges at work are in line. In such a position as he has, there will always be changes and plenty of things to tackle. He could work 24/7 if he wanted to. Still, he notices a difference.

He finds it difficult to put a finger on exactly what it is that changed, but the days go by easier. He does not get so tired and notices he stresses (much) less. What he also sees is that he makes better decisions when it boils. He manages to have a clear head under pressure.

He notices the spark of life has returned.

The time is 11:45 PM. It is summertime. Hot, damp air. Dark. Spotlights scatters lights across the assembly and on the stage. There is mysterious smoke that spreads across the big, gorgeous pool. My fingers sweating, laughter in the air and expectations are rising.

Magne Furuholmen from a-ha is there, Petter and Gunnhild Stordalen, best Norwegian event agency, Finansavisen, a wonderful group of influential, beautiful, good-looking happy women and men.

I have rocked myself for the occasion. Shiny pants, black corset top and wild curls. I'm excited. Pretty excited actually, but the difference from before is that I do not wish to be sucked into a parallel universe anymore. I have not vomited or been filled with infinite self-hate either, even though I am now going to play for my youth idol in a-ha.

Then I hear in my ear: one-two-three, one-two-three.

There we go! Antonio Vivaldi's intense 4th movement from “The Summer” kicks-off at the facility and on the soundtrack in my ear. I need that to keep on track. To hear the programmed orchestra I helped recording.

These are the most intense 3+ minutes I have ever experienced. I close my eyes to stay focused, because where I stand on high heels, in the middle of the most beautiful pool you can imagine, I see the host swimming out into the water on his way to me. What happens now I think…Help!

Behind me, dancers dance with bat-like LEDs and the music moves towards the final cadence. The host has stopped in the water right in front of me where I stand and play and when I open my eyes again, I look straight into his. We smile at each other and glimpse the rest of the congregation a few meters away.

They clap and are completely over themselves. "Wonderful," I think. "I did it". Without being brave, just by being myself. Yes.

I do not think it is possible to really have a deep felt impact or touch other people unless it comes from a real place inside us.

From something that points to something fundamentally human, something that comes from the heart and stomach, as well as the intellect.

When we tune in to ourselves and our surroundings. Then we talk business.

When I work with teams, management teams and 1: 1 with Executives, my task is to raise awareness of this fundamental place in us. It is the basis for all our behaviour, actions, good and bad decisions, impact, wellbeing, results, crisis management, trust.

I really love my job and my life now. I love watching people and businesses thrive and employee well-being.

I also love my story. The whole palette and all the people who have been a part of my life. I've learned something from all my experiences, really. Not always good experiences and not easy ones, but thus stronger growth.

I love reminding my clients why they always have access to the good feeling, no matter how rocky and difficult times they go through.

When we humans do well with ourselves, we also do well together and from there everything is possible.

Thank you for reading and feel free to contact me for a pleasant conversation if you became a little curious to learn more about Tune In Labs and how we work.

-Written with heart and soul by Aja